I wasted my 20s. Here’s how: A Born Muslim’s “Convert Story”.
It was all necessary. Those experiences made me who I am today.
But that doesn’t mean others have to make the same mistakes, or worse.
You don’t have to learn the hard way. Most of you will because you don’t listen to people with more experience than you.
Some of you won’t. You’re the smart ones. This post is for you.
Like me, Alexander Juan Antonio Cortes wasted his 20s.
I asked him to join me in the Becoming the Alpha Muslim podcast to talk about the mistakes we both made.
We also tell you how young Muslim men (and non-Muslim men) in their late teens and early-to-mid 20s can do better.
If your 20s were better than your 30s— Alexander J.A Cortes (@AJA_Cortes) September 15, 2017
You've wasted both decades
“What If you wasted your 20s?”— Alexander J.A Cortes (@AJA_Cortes) November 21, 2017
You get to work.
You stop wasting time worrying, and begin taking action
Time can ABSOLUTELY be wasted— Alexander J.A Cortes (@AJA_Cortes) November 21, 2017
"I wouldn't be who I am" is a delusion that people tell themselves because admitting they wasted years of life is too painful https://t.co/5hZVRmwu6t
If you believe its too late to change, then it is— Alexander J.A Cortes (@AJA_Cortes) November 21, 2017
If you believe you still have time, and potential
then you do.
Not a difficult choice to make
"Im 29 and Im not a millionaire and I wasted my time and Im worried for my future and oh god what do I do???"— Alexander J.A Cortes (@AJA_Cortes) November 21, 2017
1-Calm the fuck down
2-You've still got the REST OF YOUR LIFE to make something of yourself— Alexander J.A Cortes (@AJA_Cortes) November 21, 2017
3-Start working on yourself
4-Your worrying doesnt mean shit
5-Repeat step 3
If you don’t know who Alex is, he was one of my earliest podcast guests. We talked about the connection between physicality and spirituality.
You should listen to it after you finish listening to this one. Both are jam-packed with invaluable wisdom and practical life advice.
Do you have any questions about anything we discuss during the episode? Leave a comment below and let us know.
What to learn more from Alexander Juan Antonio Cortes?
- Subscribe to his daily email newsletter; I highly recommend this
- Follow him on Twitter, Instagram, and Snapchat
- [00:40] Who is Alexander Juan Antonio Cortes?
- [02:00] You don’t rise to the level of the occasion, you fall to the level of your training. Alex’s email marketing experiment writing to his list 3 times a day, every day.
- [03:40] Alex writes from a place of personal experience. He knows how to waste your 20s because he did it.
- [05:25] My own experience wasting my 20s as a college dropout. I flunked out.
- [06:25] The contemporary culture of extending adolescence far beyond teenage years and well into one’s 20s. I didn’t start “adulting” until I got married at 28.
- [07:40] How Alex’s Jewishness helped him get his career started faster. How many jacked, Mexican, male, Jewish ballet dancers are there?
- [12:14] Go to university without a plan and come out of it with a mountain of student loan debt and no job prospects.
- [14:30] Universities in America: a federally supported racket.
- [16:38] Keep company with losers who have no interest in education or making the best of their time in university and turn into a loser yourself
- [19:20] If you think this doesn’t happen to Muslims, you are delusional.
- [20:30] Believe that graduating from university, an environment that rewards you doing the bare minimum, has prepared you for the real world. Think that you are entitled to success and reward just because you show up.
- [22:20] Ignore your health, eat crap, and don’t bother exercising because your body can handle it at that age.
- [26:00] If you use your time in college wisely, you can make the best physique gains of your life.
- [28:55] Spend your money and your parents’ money frivolously, on yourself and your friends, so you can gain status. Spend money on women thinking it will get you laid.
- [31:15] Muslim guys: spending money on girls is doubly pointless for you because you can’t smash anyways. HARAM. Alex talks about premarital sex.
- [33:00] Get into a romantic relationship with a girl and become a slave to her and lose your sense of self, molding yourself to her wants.
- [35:30] How SHOULD you spend your time in college with respect to your interactions with women? Alex and I answer a question from one of my readers. ALL akhis in high school and college MUST listen to this.
- [39:00] Alex tells the story of a Sikh woman he met during his travels to India, who dated in college, regretted it, and chose to rely on her parents’ wisdom to find her a husband.
- [41:00] At no time in your life will you have 4 years, uninterrupted, to just work on yourself and becoming the best man you can be. THE BRO ZONE: Muslim men, do not, under any circumstances, allow yourself to get in the bro-zone.
- [43:30] Can men and women be friends? Alex weighs in with his observations and his own experiences in looking for a Jewish woman to marry.
- [47:00] Wait for things to happen. Just wait. Don’t take any concrete, deliberate steps to grow as a man, prepare yourself for becoming a husband and father, and achieve your goals.
- [49:30] The failure of many parents to prepare their children for adulthood.
- [52:00] Don’t listen to men older than you. Believe you know more about life and the world than men who are 10 or 20 years your senior with many, many more life experiences than you.
- [55:00] Alex is working on a book of 40-50 axioms on making the most of your youth and living a successful life, as well as a book on masculine archetypes.
- [57:30] How did Alex end up with 40+ axioms? I surprise him by teaching about the Islamic tradition of gathering 40 hadith in a compilation.
- [1:00:12] Here’s how you can stay in touch with Alex: Subscribe to his daily email newsletter, and follow him on Twitter, Instagram, and Snapchat
- [1:02:10] Subscribe to the Becoming the Alpha Muslim Podcast on iTunes, and leave us a rating and review.