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The Definitive Guide to Halal & Haram Sex Acts (Muslims Like to F*** Too)

TL;DR: Summary Of Halal And Haram Sex Acts. This is for those of you who just want quick answers and don’t want to read the entire post or the fatwas referenced.

  • Blowjobs — Allowed. Don’t swallow any sexual fluids
  • Eating pussy — Allowed. Don’t swallow any sexual fluids
  • Cumming on her face/body — Depends. Some say allowed, some say not allowed
  • Swallowing cum— Swallowing cum is not allowed, male or female
  • Eating ass — Allowed. Don’t stick your tongue inside the anus
  • Vaginal fingering – Allowed
  • Anal fingering — Not allowed. You can massage the anus with your fingers without penetration
  • Masturbation – Not allowed. Mutual masturbation between husband and wife is allowed
  • Handjobs – Allowed
  • Titty bang — Allowed
  • Butt job — Allowed
  • BDSM — Allowed
  • Sex toys — Allowed. Don’t penetrate the vagina or anus with the toy
  • Phone sex — Allowed. Masturbating during phone sex is not allowed
  • Cyber sex — Allowed. Masturbating during cybersex is not allowed
  • Food play — Allowed. Keep it away from the genitalia, don’t let it touch any sexual fluids, and don’t waste any of it
  • Threesomes – Not allowed. You can only have sex with one wife at a time. Sorry, fellas 😛

Note: One of my teachers clarified a few issues regarding the fatwas I presented below. I have added his comments as footnotes to the article and referenced them in the post.

You’re probably reading this article because you had a question about whether a particular sex act is halal or haram.

Judging by the search queries that lead people to this article, we Muslims have a lot of kinky questions.

Here are just few examples:

halal haram sex acts is fingering allowed in islam bdsm in islam

The good news is you’ve come to the right place.

The bad news is some of the kinky stuff you are hoping is halal, isn’t.

However – and this is more good news – there are many bedroom shenanigans that are halal.

Honestly, I was surprised at just how much erotic fun husbands are allowed to have with their wives and vice versa.

So, if you’re married, you’ll enjoy this article very much.

If you’re a bride- or bridegroom-to-be, you and your fiance should use it as homework.

And if you’re single, with marriage far off, go read some Quran (you might get a little excited reading this.)

Why I Wrote This Article

I used to spend a lot of time on Reddit’s r/islam subforum.

It’s a place where a lot of questions get asked that Muslims would be shy to ask IRL.

One topic that would come up fairly regularly – sex in Islam.

Specifically, what Muslims are and aren’t allowed to do in the bedroom.

For example:

is eating ass haram

This questioner is asking if rim jobs – that is, orally stimulating the anus – are haram

is sucking dick haram

Questions about oral sex – fellatio and cunnilingus – are the most popular.

sex in islam what is not allowed

Soon-to-be married men and women turn to r/islam for sex advice.

Aside from my annoyance at people being too lazy to do their own research, I got tired of seeing the same questions over and over again.

So I wrote a detailed comment about it and linked it whenever the issue came up.

That’s what inspired this article.

General Guidelines About Sexual Intimacy In Islam

First, I’m going to state the obvious.

We are not talking about pre-marital, extra-marital, or homosexual sex.

It goes without saying that these are all haram.

When we talk about sex in Islam, we’re talking about a Muslim man and a Muslim woman who are married to each other.

In this context, Here are some general rules:

  • Everything is allowed except anal sex and period sex (that is, sex while the woman is menstruating.) [1]
  • Use your best judgment and when in doubt, err on the side of caution. This is a good practice in all matters, worldly and religious.
  • Both spouses must agree to what they are doing during intercourse. You are not allowed to force your spouse to do something he/she doesn’t want to do.
  • If someone tells you a particular sex act is haram they need to prove their claim. This is because, in worldly matters – things that aren’t acts of worship – everything is halal until proven haram.

There are slight differences in rulings depending on which madhab (school of law) you follow.

Some are more strict than others.

The fatwas I’ve included in the article are all from Shafi’i and Hanafi scholars.

At the time I researched this article, I couldn’t find any Hanbali or Maliki references.

For the rest of this article, I’m going to list the sex acts and summarize my findings.

I’m not going to go into technicalities unless necessary.

If you want to know the details, please read the linked fatwas.

Are Blowjobs Halal Or Haram?

Blowjobs are allowed.

There is some disagreement as to what extent fellatio/cunnilingus is allowed, because of the consideration that one must not get needlessly filthy.

Pre-cum is considered filth, so the husband/wife will get it in his/her mouth, and on his/her face and hands.

One can get around this by wearing a condom/dental dam.

Another opinion is that ‘spreading filth’ is a natural part of sex between couples, so the pre-cum that is spread during fellatio/cunnilingus is normal and not a problem.

You can follow whichever of these opinions you are most comfortable with.

Note: the same considerations apply if you want to cum on your wife’s face (sometimes called a “facial”) or her body (like a “pearl necklace.”)

Is Eating Pussy Halal Or Haram?

It is permissible to perform oral sex on your wife.

What’s interesting to note is that in medieval works of fiqh (law) our Islamic scholars mention the man going down on the woman and not the other way around.

And they explicitly mention him kissing/licking/sucking the clitoris, the location most likely to bring about her orgasm.

Is Swallowing Cum Halal Or Haram?

Swallowing cum is not allowed – whether the man’s or the woman’s – because it is not permissible to ingest filth. [2][3]

Wash your mouth out when you’re done.

Is Eating Ass Halal Or Haram?

This is allowed based on the fact that blowjobs and eating pussy are allowed.

Don’t penetrate the anus with your tongue or swallow any filth.

Is Fingering Halal Or Haram?

Fingering the vagina:

The wording of this fatwa implies that it’s allowed to finger your wife.

Fingering the anus:

According to this fatwa, anal fingering is not allowed.

But you can massage the anus with a finger or rub your penis on it without penetration.

Are Handjobs Halal Or Haram?

It’s ok for a wife to give her husband a handjob, according to this fatwa.

Is Masturbation Halal Or Haram?

Masturbation is not allowed according to the four schools.

However, the Hanafis and Hanbalis say if you are afraid you might fornicate, then you can masturbate to relieve yourself.

Mutual masturbation between a husband and wife, on the other hand, is allowed (see the fatwas on fingering and handjobs above.)

Rubbing The Penis On Other Parts Of The Wife’s Body

According to this fatwa, a husband can rub his penis between his wife’s breasts (known as a “titty bang”) as well as between her buttocks (known as a “butt job.”)

Is Cumming In Your Wife’s Mouth Or On Her Face/Body Haram Or Halal?

With regard to sex acts like throatpies, facials, pearl necklaces, etc., the same considerations about spreading filth apply that I mentioned earlier.

If you take the opinion that needlessly spreading filth is not allowed, then ejaculating in your wife’s mouth or on her face/body is not allowed.

Is BDSM Halal Or Haram?

BDSM is an acronym for Bondage, Dominance, and Sadism/Masochism.

According to this fatwa, BDSM is allowed as long as both the husband and wife agree to it.

Are Sex Toys Halal Or Haram?

Sex toys are allowed – like dildos and vibrators – but only during sex (not for masturbation.)

They should only be used to stimulate the wife’s clit and not inserted into the vagina. [4]

Note: It doesn’t make sense to me why Hanafis would say it’s OK for you to finger your wife but not stick a toy in her vagina.

Are butt plugs haram?

I haven’t found any fatwas on this.

Better to err on the side of caution.

Are Phone Sex And Cybersex Halal Or Haram?

Phone sex is allowed between spouses.

But not if the objective is to help one or both of the spouses masturbate.

Similarly, Cybersex is also allowed.

Using Food During Foreplay

Using food as a prop during sex is allowed.

As long as you keep it away from the genitalia, don’t let it touch filth, and don’t waste any of it.


I’ll close out this article by making this important point:

The Muslim World used to be far more sexually progressive than we are today.

My hypothesis is that due to Western cultural hegemony, Muslims reacted by rejecting the West’s sexual permissiveness in order to preserve our Islamic heritage.

In doing so, we have thrown the baby out with the bathwater and rejected what is perfectly halal for us enjoy, of the ways between a man and a woman.

The Sahaba were more liberal than the conservative Muslims of today and more conservative than the liberal Muslims of today.

Imam Al-Suyuti wrote a sex manual entitled “Nawadir Al-Ayk” as an appendix to a longer book on the benefits of marriage called “Al-Wishah min Fawa’id al-Nikah.”

In it, he lists more than 48 sexual positions – laying down, on one’s side, seated, standing, and on one’s knees.

He also mentions techniques for delaying orgasm and different ways to move the penis.

He also discusses female orgasm and affirms that women like different things.

He also includes a how-to for pleasurable sex.

The Imam also opined the best sex manual was “Tuhfat al-’Arus wa-Nuzhat al-Nufus,” by Abu Abdillah ibn Ahmad al-Bija’i.

Imam Al-Ghazali’s Ihya Uloom Al-Din also has a section in the chapter on marriage on how best to have sex.

He mentions, for example, that the minimum frequency of sexual intimacy should be once every 4 days unless one has a valid excuse, that the husband should continue to penetrate the wife until she reaches orgasm if he climaxes before her, and other specifics.

Look, people. Let’s use some common sense here.

Get married, hump each other’s brains out, and have screaming orgasms.

Just don’t stick it in her butt or in her vag when she’s bleeding.

And don’t swallow any cum or precum (husband or wife.)

That pretty much covers everything you need to know about halal and haram sex.


  1. “The guideline is that everything is allowed EXCEPT anal sex and period sex.” Yes, and one more thing is relevant apropos the discussion: ingesting filth.
  2. Semen is mustaqdhar (gross) — not najis. It is unlawful to ingest gross things. That’s in the event that someone were able to ejaculate without pre-cum rendering it filthy.
  3. Some vaginal secretions are considered pure, others filthy. They are mucus, which makes them mustaqdhar even if tahir. So licking and sucking the clitoris is fine, while doing the vagina runs into the aforementioned problem.
  4. Why can’t they be inserted into the vagina? Reasoning is needed. Fingers are fine. But the general rule is that your genitals are halal only to your spouse. Inanimate objects require research.
143 comments… add one
  • Tahir Dec 14, 2016 @ 20:45

    ok let me be brave and be the first one to publicly like this without feeling bad.

    • Nabeel Azeez Dec 15, 2016 @ 14:23

      Thanks, Tahir. Glad you liked it. Please share it with your friends.

      What other topics would you like me to write about?

  • JasonRMJ (جاسون) Mar 8, 2017 @ 19:05

    as a non-muslim isn’t this liwat (لواط) (sodomy)?

    • Nabeel Azeez Mar 8, 2017 @ 19:12

      Isn’t what sodomy?

      • JasonRMJ (جاسون) Mar 8, 2017 @ 19:40

        Anal fingering the description pretty much defeats the purpose from doing it…..

        • Nabeel Azeez Mar 8, 2017 @ 19:50

          Anal fingering is not allowed. One may fondle the anus without penetration.

          • JasonRMJ (جاسون) Mar 8, 2017 @ 19:51


          • muslim.husband Nov 22, 2017 @ 0:26

            It’s not allowed as it’s a non purified place (nags), but it’s not lwat, lwat (being guy)

          • JasonRMJ (جاسون) Nov 23, 2017 @ 13:19

            fucking the ass is pretty much liwat

          • JasonRMJ (جاسون) Dec 11, 2017 @ 23:09

            liwat is committing sodomy, so basically it’s pretty fucking liwat to sodomize a person’s buttock for sexual gratification, being gay is not haram, having gay sex is haram…

          • muslim.husband Dec 12, 2017 @ 1:35

            I think we need to differentiate between transgression and gay, transgression is a biological cause, but being a gay is different, it’s psychological, every one born in fitrah, bad actions and habits turn Man beyond fitra, sodomy men started first by talking and walking like women, touching themselves, till they were punished by ALLAH turned into gays, and this is what they deserve.

            Appreciate your discussion

          • JasonRMJ (جاسون) Dec 19, 2017 @ 14:02

            I don’t really understand the sentences you’re trying to convey here, first off transgression can mean wrong,sin and crime so I don’t know why you think “biological cause” has to do with anything. Also, Talking and walking like a woman, touching themselves is a terrible way of finding people if they’re homosexuals or not, your description of homosexuals are stereotypes.

            Even if it’s true, your God already knows their past present future life, basically they’re already gay in the first place. What you’re saying makes no logical sense because God automatically knows their life.

  • Ornl Apr 18, 2017 @ 2:29

    Is the footnote about mutual masturbation including the cyber/phonesex?

  • Jamal Jul 3, 2017 @ 9:04

    “…the husband should keep at it if he finishes before she does.”

    How is this even possible though? He’s going to go limp after ejaculating and if you’re saying he should use other means than his penis, the desire is diminished too. Realistically speaking, this ain’t possible. But he should continue as soon as he’s able to get another erection. Is that what is meant? This should be clarified for the men.

    • Nabeel Azeez Jul 3, 2017 @ 9:53

      Jamaal, a healthy male can maintain an erection for a minute or more after ejaculation. So, as long as the woman is not too far away from her orgasm, he can manage it. Just keep giving her the stroke until she climaxes.

    • Mada May 23, 2021 @ 14:04

      Como mulher falando realisticamente isso é mais do que possível. É mais fácil para as mulheres terem orgasmos quando o clitoris é estimulado, logo é provável que depois de alguma penetração ela chegue ao orgasmo rapidamente com a estimulação clitoriana do marido com os dedos.

  • Jamal Jul 3, 2017 @ 9:08

    Love your articles bro. So sick of the feminist crap out there. Men gotta take control of the narrative and their women. Alpha males are the best husbands and pious muslimahs know this.

  • Swan Zi Aug 26, 2017 @ 3:12

    Hard to tell if it’s a Muslim writing this article or a Kaafir. Just because we blot out some letters doesn’t mean we’re not using these filthy expressions kuffaar use.

    Honestly, bro. Have some shame. Sure, Islam embraces and promotes sex between spouses. It also promotes purity and nobility.

  • Fatma Sep 26, 2017 @ 14:19

    so basically nothing is allowed even after nikkah

  • Franck Serpico Sep 27, 2017 @ 0:09

    Bdsm —> master/mistress and slave/submissive. Bow down before a human being, kiss feet, etc. Is it not shirk ?

    • Nabeel Azeez Sep 27, 2017 @ 11:34

      Hi, Franck. You’re doing something called an “extreme reach bias”.

      Taking something you don’t fully understand, thinking of the worst possible extreme example, and making a judgment based on it.

      This entire post is about enjoying what is halal while avoiding the haram.

      Why would I tell people to do something that is shirk? And why would the fatwa I linked to say bdsm is permissible if there is any connotation of shirk?

      Try to read with husn adh-dhann.

  • Maya Nov 21, 2017 @ 18:37

    So, being the curious little teen I am, I browsed the internet for a guideline as to what is haraam and halaal in sex and I found this page and after reading it, my mind asks another question:

    What do you exactly mean by masturbation?

    Now, don’t get me wrong. Don’t just read that one sentence and go, “WTF, child?” No.

    What I mean is, by masturbation (incase of women), do you mean that inserting something into the vagina is haraam while stimulating the clit is okay or is the entire thing haraam?

    I’d be really, REALLY grateful if you shed some light on this.

    • Nabeel Azeez Nov 21, 2017 @ 19:46

      Masturbation is to self-stimulate the sexual organs for the purpose of achieving orgasm. In the case of a woman, she stimulates her clitoris with her fingers or a foreign object and/or inserts her fingers or a foreign object into her vagina.

  • muslim.husband Nov 22, 2017 @ 0:23

    I misunderstood the point of toys, why husband can’t interest toys in his wife vagina or anus, or even make her cum, masturbate by his not herself?

  • disqus_x4BR6ht8ME Jan 11, 2018 @ 5:46

    You know I came here wanting to learn some stuff about sexually pleasureable things that could be done and you’ve answered them clearly. So thank you for that. But I don’t appreciate the unnecessary sexist and rude remarks you were saying about women like how they can’t speak up about topics like these (which is ironic since that’s what you’re doing in such a blunt way, which is fine since it answers Islamic questions) or that they “need to get back to the kitchen”, etc. The whole point of this article was for you to talk about sex and you shamelessly diverge it to being a complete ass for no reason. This isn’t even about feminism or anything but I find it SO funny how you are more butthurt and seem like you’re in the verge of an emotional breakdown more than any feminist I’ve ever known. Lol. You’re so pathetic and an awful example of a “Muslim”. A REAL Muslim wouldn’t discriminate and be hateful towards ANY gender for that matter. And Islam promotes the equality of both genders if you didn’t know that and is solely based on respect, kindness, and humbleness (even if you’re asked a blunt or embarrassing question). So for starters, I really thought you were doing a great job by answering questions people would be ashamed to ask in real life. And it was a great favor for the many of us I have to admit. But when you started saying unnecessaryly childish and hateful remarks that’s when I thought “who let this person use the internet?” Besides, a “Muslim” would know that Islam always encouraged the respect of women, as our beloved prophet (PHUH) always talked about this, and is pretty much an almost feminist religion before any other religion, nation, and culture started treating women fairly and equally. So kudus to you my friend. You officially showed your true colors and made it seem like Islam is such an awful religion by being a complete sexist and an asshole.

    • Nabeel Azeez Dec 19, 2019 @ 17:48

      Hahaha. Thanks for the feedback, I guess. I’m gonna make an educated guess and assume you’re not married. 😛

      • Muamer Feb 22, 2020 @ 3:34

        The greatest comeback I’ve ever seen

        • Syed Alkaff Jul 3, 2021 @ 6:48

          ahaahahahah bruuhh

    • Aadhil sha Dec 12, 2020 @ 16:31

      I don’t know who the hell are you but all I wanna say is the islam religion cannot be judged or commented by any other persons other than Allah and his prophets so if you are actually saying that islam is the worst religion then please go and read quran and sex is not the only thing that you can discuss.there are so many beautiful other things in islam that teaches us humanity and love .✌️

  • Hmmmmm Jul 17, 2019 @ 1:05

    Totally agree^ the info was easy to read and good but please stop with the rude comments and please stop being hypocritical

    • Nabeel Azeez Dec 19, 2019 @ 17:48

      Lol, that’s cute. 😘

  • Malaikah Jul 28, 2019 @ 22:57

    Hey Nabeel! Can I just say I absolutely loveeedddd your article! It was so refreshing to see such a relaxed, laid back take on sex and all things taboo! Am signing up for your email course and would love for you to hear more from you about societally hushed topics (intersex/hermaphrodite people, why masturbation is consider haraam etc) May Allah bless you for normalizing and fostering discussion on a topic which others feel “afraid” or “uncomfortable” to discuss, thereby unfortunately leaving tremendous room for misinterpretation and err! The Prophet (SAW) himself used to answer such questions, hence I find it appalling how taboo we’ve made such discussions. Please don’t let the hate pull you down or doubt that what you’re doing isnt right. Because honestly your approach is the most accessible one to a teenager going into early adulthood, like me! Lots of duas for your success and happiness ❤️

    • Nabeel Azeez Jul 30, 2019 @ 18:25

      Thank you. This means a lot. Allah bless you!

  • Uzaam Oct 31, 2019 @ 16:26

    I heard that masturbating is ‘Debatable’
    Sooooooo…I thought that something debatable is actually lawful??
    Pls respond

    • Nabeel Azeez Oct 31, 2019 @ 17:36

      It’s not debatable. It’s not lawful. Ask your local scholar regarding matters of halal and haram.

  • DZ Dec 3, 2019 @ 8:50

    Is it permissible for a wife to wear a butt plug during sex ?

    • Nabeel Azeez Dec 3, 2019 @ 9:05

      Nope. No sticking anything in anyone’s butt.

      • DZ Dec 3, 2019 @ 10:21

        Ok, thanks for the enlightenment.

  • Ahmad tariq Dec 19, 2019 @ 6:37

    This is helpful although your language at some points went rude I know some dominant women and feminists that keeps bragging their rights and their orgasm and look where that has brought them. The problem is people learn sex from porn now I’m not saying I’m a clean slave but you know as technology progresses porn progressed too now it’s not old times basically I’m saying is it okay if a woman bdsm man being submissive (lots of women want it ) but for me when I see these kinds of things its literally torture for me normal sex is fine

    • Nabeel Azeez Dec 19, 2019 @ 17:38

      If normal sex is fine for you and your wife, that’s good! Other couples might be a little more adventurous, though. 😉

  • g.a Dec 23, 2019 @ 9:58

    thank u 4 such an explicit article. but there is one topic that u have not covered, if i may ask… is it allowed for the husband to give his wife a clitoral orgasm (without of course penetration) during her menstrual cycle??

    • Nabeel Azeez Dec 23, 2019 @ 13:31

      Wassalam. Use your own judgment.

  • Mumu Feb 8, 2020 @ 16:18

    I’ve been looking around and didn’t find any answer. Is it allowed to use connected sex toys with your spouse? I have to travel for work and we would like to have leveled up cybersex/sexcall. So each of the partner would be controlling from distance the sextoy of the other partner.
    thanks in advance!!

    • Nabeel Azeez Feb 8, 2020 @ 16:22

      Just wait until you get home and do the real thing.

  • dejori Mar 12, 2020 @ 9:25

    bruh u funny asf tysm for this.
    is banging on a pillow (as a girl) that gives a tiny ass amount of pleasure counted as masturbating? idk who else to ask

    • Nabeel Azeez Mar 12, 2020 @ 10:09

      If it makes you cum then it’s masturbation.

  • Haleemah Mar 31, 2020 @ 7:32

    You had me until the “autistic” comment.
    Most autistic adults have very healthy active children producing sex lives with thier partners.

    • Nabeel Azeez Mar 31, 2020 @ 8:43

      Barakallahu feeki

  • Leona Apr 3, 2020 @ 4:13

    Ok, all ya talk about spouses leaving divorced women at the bay with no pleasure. What should divorced women do to satisfy her sexual needs. No toys, no masturbation, or wait to get married again lol? That doesn’t sound fair for divorced women. What are your suggestion in this matter?

    • Nabeel Azeez Apr 3, 2020 @ 6:53

      Call me. I have 3 spots on the team. We can get you sorted out. 😘

    • Qasem Apr 16, 2020 @ 11:56

      I was just wondering, is masturbating without looking at anything and without cumming in order to prevent myself from looking at anything halal?
      Also if you don’t understand my question, just let me know because I’m not that good at explaining things. 😬

      • Nabeel Azeez Apr 16, 2020 @ 14:05

        If you masturbate without looking at anything or cumming…

        that will only increase your desire to look at something and cum.

        • Qasem Apr 17, 2020 @ 4:16

          Ok thanks, just wanted to make sure.

          • Nabeel Azeez Apr 17, 2020 @ 10:05

            You’re welcome, Qasem.

  • Qasem Apr 17, 2020 @ 4:19

    Ok thanks, just wanted to make sure.

  • Zayn Daoud Apr 18, 2020 @ 16:23


    Full disclosure, this is about homosexuality. I have no one to talk to about this and I am struggling with my sexuality.

    I am attracted to men, and I am trying to be attracted to women—I am scared to marry a woman and not tell her the truth about my attraction. And…not get hard on my wedding night.

    I understand pre-marital sex is haram and sex after marriage is halal. Would same-sex marriages be halal?

    Dr. Shabir Ally recently commented on the book, “Islamic Law and Muslim Same Sex Unions” and I would just appreciate your insight on this. Please don’t attack my message, I’m trying to get on the ‘right’ path but I’m struggling and it’s impacting my mental health.

    • Nabeel Azeez Apr 18, 2020 @ 16:39

      Wa alaikum assalam warahmatullahi wabarakatuh.

      Same-sex marriage will never be halal.

      Homosexual sex will never be halal.

      The only halal sex is that between a husband and wife.

  • Ziltoid94 May 3, 2020 @ 18:14

    Aslm nabeel, is dominant /submissive or master /slave relationship (between married couples) allowed in islam?

    • Nabeel Azeez May 4, 2020 @ 10:09

      Wa alaikum assalam warahmatullahi wabarakatuh.

      I believe that is answered by the fatwa on BDSM cited in the article.

      According to that fatwa, it’s OK if both the husband and wife consent.

  • Arishfa May 7, 2020 @ 15:23

    Rubbing clitoris is haram???
    – By an Unmarried one
    Please reply nabeel bro

    • Nabeel Azeez May 8, 2020 @ 12:24

      Read the article.

    • Imy Jun 26, 2020 @ 21:51

      Salaam! what if the theme of the relationship is based off femdom where the women dominates the submissive man and both consent to this, meaning the wife wears the pants and is dominant in and out of the bedroom.

  • Asad May 9, 2020 @ 8:49

    I would love if you reply to this, I’ve been searching everywhere for my question, is masturbating without ejaculating allowed?

    • Nabeel Azeez May 9, 2020 @ 14:16

      I don’t know.

      If you masturbate without ejaculating, that will only increase your desire to ejaculate.

      Once you start, it’s difficult to stop.

  • Bruh May 12, 2020 @ 21:34

    About the rim job, isn’t a rim job penetrating a woman from the backside? How is it allowed

    • Nabeel Azeez May 13, 2020 @ 11:50

      It doesn’t penetrate the anus.

  • Mohammed Shakil May 20, 2020 @ 1:32

    What’s the point of phone sex if you cant mastrubate together.

    Getting excited but can’t complete it.

    • Nabeel Azeez May 20, 2020 @ 11:14

      So don’t do it then.

    • Asma Jun 3, 2020 @ 3:58

      As a girl i dont always cum when i masturbate but i orgasm. So is it still haram if i dont cum?

      • Nabeel Azeez Jun 3, 2020 @ 13:39

        Asma, masturbating is not allowed in general. Whether or not you orgasm or cum.

  • Hima May 28, 2020 @ 17:29

    but a question i haven’t seen answered yet is, are unmarried and/or married women allowed to masturbante if they don’t finger themselves? as in by stimulating the clitoris?

    • Nabeel Azeez May 28, 2020 @ 18:09

      It’s the same whether you rub the clitoris or finger the vagina.

      Masturbation is not allowed in general.

  • Abdulla leed Jun 17, 2020 @ 12:04

    Dear Mr Nabeel Azeez, asalamu alaikum

    Hello I’m Abdulla (formerly Dave), I married to a Muslim woman descending from south asia(paki with Indian passport[mix]) who looks Turkish, she is beautiful and kind. She is one of the most generous woman I have ever met in my life for now. She treats me like a king unlike my sisters-in-law (my brothers’ wives) who kicks bottom for nothing. She is clean unlike her relatives who have dirt on neck, hand and face like ringworm.
    I married her last September (2019) and virgin ever since…. I’m a reverted man to islam 2 years back during my visit to Malaysia for internship courses (as a doctor) and met a friend who was an inspiration for me to join Islam(he made me aware about wahabism and showed me real Islam[sunni-tarika]). In the airport to Durban, I have to go transit via India. And then I met her. She is surprised that I’m muslim and claimed me cute. After two months we got married and moved to middle east as a surgeon and then came covid-19 (just after 2 months of moving together).
    I never touched her despite knowing her culture, but I want to make love just after this will be over. Thank you so much sir for the information above as it was clear and made me feel relieved (thinking sex is forbidden)
    I just wanted to know the approval of these things:-
    • Wearing lingerie with stocking and other sorts of seductive clothing to turn me on.
    • Having anniversary celebrated like valentine (romantic with candles and rose petals with babydoll dress).
    • Spanking her butt regularly and during copulation (sex).
    • Sucking her breast during sex, when without sex (buttoning off shirt [or her Pakistani salwar/top tunic] from above and fondle it) and massage when I’m with her and kiss as a stimulation[dry suckle].
    • Going for natural milk induction without hormones and pregnancy (like massage techniques and food).
    • Starting milking or adult feeding for pleasure
    • Making her wear tight clothes like jeans, t-shirt or such modern clothes only at home.
    • Convincing her to wear bath suits like bikini, monokini at home(bath tub and jacuzzi in my accomodation)…..
    • Having shower together(like after sex or for passion) with her naked
    • Sleeping naked together like in the movies.
    • Sex with her naked without blanket on bed or sofa.
    That’s all sir! I want my first time to be my best time and want to give her a surprise. I have seen many sites and there are complicated with many narrations. I just want your point of view.

    Sorry for long description and (sometimes)stupid question i have asked. I just want to make her happy with halal/safe way.

    Abdulla(david) & Sana.

    *she agrees with all harmless things i ask(like trying a hang glider or offroading. so shes fine and will agree with this)*

    • Nabeel Azeez Jun 17, 2020 @ 12:48

      Wa alaikum assalam warahmatullahi wabarakatuh.

      You’re going about this the wrong way.

      You don’t need a fatwa for every single thing.

      And I am not a scholar.

      • Abdulla leed Jun 18, 2020 @ 11:06

        Thanks sir, Sorry for such caution i have done to you. I’ll find someone else like a scholar or anyone appropriate. Its my fault.

  • Imy Jun 26, 2020 @ 21:52

    Salaam! what if the theme of the relationship is based off femdom where the women dominates the submissive man and both consent to this, meaning the wife wears the pants and is dominant in and out of the bedroom?

    • Nabeel Azeez Jun 27, 2020 @ 11:18


      I don’t know.

  • Rosie Jul 26, 2020 @ 14:51

    OK let me be brave too. Can a single muslim man or woman use vibrator?

    • Nabeel Azeez Jul 26, 2020 @ 15:16


  • Max Wrist Aug 15, 2020 @ 4:05

    Okay i get it that anal sex is haram that means it’s not allowed to penetrate the penis into the anus because it can harm the woman and she would feel pain. But what’s wrong with sticking the tongue inside the anus? As long as penis penetration hasn’t happened it’s not an anal intercourse right!? And from what I’ve heard it is permissible to give pleasure to the whole body of a woman and i know that woman love it when the tongue is sticked inside the anus. So my question is it’s not harming them right? And as long as the guy doesn’t swallow anything?

    • Nabeel Azeez Aug 15, 2020 @ 11:01

      The rules are the rules. Ignore them at your peril.

      Penetrating the anus with anything – penis, tongue, finger, dildo – is not allowed.

  • Asmaa Sep 1, 2020 @ 3:04

    Say if you’re towards the end if you’re period but your husband is wanting some and you’re feeling fine enough to give him a hand/blowjob or something to keep him satisfied , ofcourse whilst completely avoiding anything down there with me until we can, is that permissible

    • Nabeel Azeez Sep 1, 2020 @ 12:03


  • M Sep 17, 2020 @ 10:49


    My question is could I also contribute by writing articles on your website on various controversial topics?

    I have included my email. Look forward to your reply.

    • Nabeel Azeez Sep 17, 2020 @ 11:21

      Wa alaikum assalam warahmatullahi wabarakatuh.

      Thank you for offering.

      I don’t work with contributors on BTAM.

      However, I may launch a more general website for Muslim men in the future.

      If and when I do, I’ll keep you in mind.

  • Yazid Oct 1, 2020 @ 4:49

    Salam Nabeel, thanks for this article, very informative and useful. I was wondering if you could answer my question? Can a man with 4 wives be massaged by all of them while he is naked? (could they also give him a handjob in this scenario?) 😂 I know it’s a weird question but I’m a curious fella haha.

    • Nabeel Azeez Oct 1, 2020 @ 9:51

      Wassalam. Gangbangs are not permissible.

  • Bayan Oct 29, 2020 @ 16:14

    What about coregasms or orgasms that come from excercise?

    • Nabeel Azeez Oct 29, 2020 @ 16:50

      What about them?

      • Bayan Nov 5, 2020 @ 23:09

        Are they permissable?

        • Nabeel Azeez Nov 10, 2020 @ 13:28

          You have no control over them. In that sense, they are like a wet dream.

  • Nazreen N Nov 23, 2020 @ 14:32

    Not saying this to be rude but you seem to be unaware what some of these things are. Like eating ass. You can do it but can’t penetrate the ass? What do you think eating ass is? Actually eating it? The act is to lick ones ass. Likewise with sex toys, butt plugs are allowed so long as we don’t stick them in the butt? 😂 oh you’re so innocence…

    • Nabeel Azeez Nov 23, 2020 @ 14:40

      Not saying this to be rude but you seem to have the reading comprehension of a tea cozy.

  • Anonymous Nov 28, 2020 @ 4:50

    Some one asked Allah has said it is forbidden to do anal sex due to filth and injuries etc. What if a person uses a condom and ensures penetration without injuries

    • Nabeel Azeez Dec 2, 2020 @ 9:42

      It’s haram because Allah said so.

      Even if there were no apparent harms associated with it…

      And Allah deemed it haram…

      It would be haram.

  • Mrs. S Mar 1, 2021 @ 19:38

    I’m married 3months ago. When I’m on my periods, My husband likes to touch me but we totally avoid penetration, but it gives me arousal and I cum, I once felt my husband releases as well. As much as I like it, I’m very confused that If it is halal to relax yourself without actual act. For what I understand shouldn’t we do Sabr during this time.
    My other question is my husband had intercourse from behind in the right spot, but I didn’t like, it didn’t make me feel loved and I told him that I didn’t like it, he said he won’t do it again. I read that our Man is allowed to insert from wherever he desires, now I’m confused. Please guide me, the article says about consent but does that mean that I’m as wife allowed to say no to certain ways and positions?

    • Nabeel Azeez Mar 1, 2021 @ 19:50

      I’m not sure about your first question. You might want to ask someone else about it. My understanding is as long as there is no penetration while you are on your period, anything else is fine.

      It’s allowed for him to take you from whatever position he wants. But if you don’t like a particular position then it’s just common courtesy that he avoid it. Ultimately it’s his responsibility to make sure sex is enjoyable for you. There are dozens of other positions he can choose from.

  • Sayed Mar 4, 2021 @ 10:53

    Thank you for making this manual of sorts.
    Regarding the impermissibility of anything penetrating the anus: I know the hadiths that explicitly prevent anal sex (the man sticking his thing in the woman’s anus). I don’t understand how this means that nothing (finger, tongue, toy…) can be inserted into the anus (whether of a woman or a man)… On what basis is this considered haram? Sorry if there’s something I’m not seeing, but I read this article and the references you presented on the subject and still can’t find the proof it’s haram.
    (I feel it’s important to mention I’ve never done anything like this 😛 Just intellectual curiosity, that’s all.)

    • Nabeel Azeez Mar 4, 2021 @ 18:12

      It doesn’t matter if you don’t understand it. It’s not allowed.

      • Sayed Mar 5, 2021 @ 6:14

        Of course it matters to me! Maybe you can help me understand?

  • Mrs. S Mar 4, 2021 @ 16:55

    I wrote a query before and part of my question wasn’t clear
    that I’m newly married and my husband likes to be romantic during my periods, we avoid even undressing from waist below. But sometimes we arouse so much that we discharge. I want to know if it is masterbation? Is it halal?
    Other question is can we do it more than once in one night or should we clean ourselves after every time?

    • Nabeel Azeez Mar 4, 2021 @ 18:22

      1. Mutual masturbation is allowed – that is, you stimulate him and he stimulates you.

      2. There is no limit to how many times you can have sex with your spouse in one session. The following hadith indicates that the man should perform ablution between acts.

      Abu Sa’id al-Khudri reported: “The Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) said: When anyone amongst you has sexual intercourse with his wife and then he intends to repeat it, he should perform ablution.”

      In the hadith transmitted by Abu Bakr. (the words are):” Between the two (acts) there should be an ablution,” or he (the narrator) said:” Then he intended that it should be repeated.”


  • Zack Mar 16, 2021 @ 20:27

    Yo nabeel, Jak for this. Recently married and looking through the comments, I apologize if this may have already been answered.

    If I’m penetrating my wife; It seems its impermissible for her to stimulate her clit while I’m penetrating. That would fall under the category of her master bating herself.
    I’m trying to research new positons which would help me leverage my hand to stimulate her while I penetrate.

    • Nabeel Azeez Mar 16, 2021 @ 20:41

      Wa iyyak. Yes, you have the right idea.

      You can stimulate her clit if you are sitting up while penetrating her in missionary position.

      Another way to stimulate the clit is the “reach around” while penetrating doggy style – this takes a bit of dexterity and may not be possible for some couples because of one or both partners’ body types.

      The most comfortable way to stimulate the clit during penetration is from this position:

      Sideways lovin

      And if it’s not clear how to position yourself, here is a description:

      “The woman on her back and the man on his side, either with her near leg laying across his body or her near foot braced on the wall behind him while he f***s her. If he lays on his left side he can easily reach under her near leg with his right hand and can rub her clit (don’t forget the lube) while f***ing her very easily and comfortably with his head resting on a pillow, for as long as it takes until she comes on his c**k. Clitoral stimulation makes the p***y tighten up, so it’s actually ideal for both partners: him because tightness feels great and for her because the cock gives her p***y something to chew on while her clit is being pleasured.”

      • Shay Mar 17, 2021 @ 13:39

        I’ve been in the same boat. Thanks for asking and thanks nabeel for answering.

        • Nabeel Azeez Mar 17, 2021 @ 13:41

          You’re welcome.

  • Mrs. S Mar 17, 2021 @ 12:49

    Aslaam o Alaikum
    sometimes I don’t get relief when my husband does and even if I ask and he tries, I still don’t get that. I want to know if it is Halal and permitted if I relief myself by touching somewhere like my chest, or I ask him to do so?

    • Nabeel Azeez Mar 17, 2021 @ 13:23


      Both of you should spend more time on foreplay before intercourse. It takes a woman longer to become fully aroused. If you’re still unable to climax before or with him, he can stimulate your clitoris before or after intercourse until you climax.

      A lot of the female orgasm has to do with a woman’s mental state and how relaxed she is. Practicing deep breathing exercises to help you relax before and during sex.

      • Mrs S Mar 20, 2021 @ 16:59

        We spend ample time on foreplay and He only inserts when I tell himthat I’m ready.
        Sometimes it just takes me longer to get orgasm.
        What I was trying to ask is is it halal if I ask my husband to relieve me after intercourse by touching me somewhere.
        We’re newly wedded couple and we don’t touch private parts of each others.
        Is it allowed or is it masterbation and haram?

        • Nabeel Azeez Mar 23, 2021 @ 15:21

          If you can’t orgasm from regular intercourse, he should stimulate you with his mouth or his fingers until you climax.

  • Shay Mar 17, 2021 @ 13:37

    Salam, are penis plugs allowed for foreplay?

    • Nabeel Azeez Mar 17, 2021 @ 14:25

      Wassalam. I don’t know.

  • Ha Apr 18, 2021 @ 10:48


    Apologies if the question seems a little inappropriate but i need an answer, if you can.

    I understand that anal sex is forbidden, whereas the male cannot insert his penis inside the anus of a women. However, is it allowed for a women to insert a foreing object (strapon, buttplug, prostate vibrator) into a males anus? Do the same rule of anal sex applies?

    • Nabeel Azeez Apr 18, 2021 @ 10:50

      Wassalam. The same rule applies.

  • anon May 26, 2021 @ 1:29

    is breathing yourself into an orgasm allowed. like breathing heavily/ loudly and feeling tingles everywhere? i’m unmarried and having a rush of feelings.

    • Nabeel Azeez May 26, 2021 @ 12:12

      That doesn’t sound like an orgasm.

  • Mrs S Oct 21, 2021 @ 23:20

    Can I kiss my husband’s genitals?

    • Nabeel Azeez Oct 23, 2021 @ 9:35


  • Mrs. Nov 23, 2021 @ 13:54

    My husband likes to put his finger in my a**, just for a few seconds, few pushes, and then goes n washes himself. I’ve told him clearly that he can’t put anything there, he said only intercourse / putting penis is Haram, this is not haram. He has done it again and I felt so bad that I cried and had a fight with him, he still says that it’s not decent but it’s not a sin or haram.
    Can u please clarify?
    I don’t want to commit sin in a Halal relationship, nor do I want to disobey my husband and deprive him if his sexual desires for me.

    • Nabeel Azeez Nov 23, 2021 @ 18:55

      He’s not allowed to insert anything into your anus. You can show him this article if you like. The statements from scholars on the matter are enough.

      Moreover, sex should be something both parties enjoy. No one should be feeling bad.

  • Mrs. Nov 23, 2021 @ 14:02

    I’m a shy wife, my husband takes initiative. But he controls our sex life, like if he’s angry at me or not in the mood, he’d just refuse to have it no matter how much I desire. And if he desires he’d do it multiple times in one night. Even during my pregnancy, if he wants he’d ask me knowing that I’d never say No, he’d do it twice, four times in a week
    But if he feels that I want it he’d just not get in mood or make excuses like, we should be careful about your health, I’m tired, I need to sleep.
    I’ve been told before marriage that as a wife I can’t and I shouldn’t say No, if my husband asks. But now I’m deeply hurt, frustrated and sad when my desires are rejected. He has rejected me so many times that I no longer ask, I’d cry myself to sleep with frustration but I can’t tolerate him saying No.
    Tell me, what are my rights? What should I say to him?
    I’m a confident person and I talk to him if anything bothers me, just haven’t talk to him about this
    Thank you

    • Nabeel Azeez Nov 23, 2021 @ 18:57

      He shouldn’t say no to you if you’re in the mood and he isn’t.

      However, you should use your womanly charms to the best of your ability.

      A sexually aroused husband doesn’t stay upset or tired for long.

  • Haroon Jan 16, 2022 @ 12:00

    Based on your articles, its apparent you’re very educated and have done an amazing job of highlighting a taboo issue but I have only one piece of advice/criticism. As someone who has studied, you should be aware of the way an educated person should carry and convey his knowledge and the way you’ve spoke about it is unnecessarily unbefitting of one teaching Islam regardless if you’re trying to pander to youth. The way you present these topics indicate to the reader that you have firsthand knowledge of half the filth, nevermind allowing stuff like ‘rimming is permissible’. In what world could it be permissible, when its one of the most harmful and a well known method of STI transmission regardless of penetration. Instead of talking about ‘titty bangs’, its better to phrase it as rubbing the penis between the wifes breasts. Remember that every word you say and that people read will be brought up by Allah. I understand and respect the work you’re doing but some of the things you have said are inherently wrong, just because theres no Islamic text on these things doesn’t make them wholly permissible. May Allah guide us all.

    • Nabeel Azeez Jan 16, 2022 @ 12:47


      Go clutch pearls somewhere else.

      May Allah grant you some common sense.

  • Qadr Apr 19, 2022 @ 18:37

    Salam alaikum mate, absolutely Love this article, it resonated well with me than stuff on this topic ive seen in other websites, funny (couldn’t stop laughing) and informative at the same time, wish you had a twitter account, would have loved updates on other topics from you lol. Keep up the good work bruv, don’t let any of these cheeky gits in here make you feel negative. Love from AbdulQadr 🙂

    • Nabeel Azeez Apr 19, 2022 @ 18:40

      Wa alaikum assalam warahmatullahi wabarakatuh. Thank you, brother.

  • Jennah sabry Sep 21, 2022 @ 1:50

    Well what if the marriage is long distance that could last for 3 years or more. Is virtual sex as a stress releifer permissable. I feel itd better than him watching porn. As a way to regulate his hormones and not done often..thts a point to note.. on very rare occasions. May Allah have mercy on us

    • Nabeel Azeez Sep 21, 2022 @ 13:26

      Is this a real situation or hypothetical?

  • Helen Sep 28, 2022 @ 15:54

    Thankyou for clearing this up, Nabeel. As a BDSM blogger myself (though a Unitarian Universalist in my beliefs), I get asked quite a lot about how various regions view our practices. I was once engaged to a very kink-curious Muslim man, though we both knew we couldn’t explore it before marriage. Our relationship unfortunately never worked out, but that’s besides the point. It’s good to know now so that I can say for certain and I shall be sure to refer any kink-curious Muslims your way. Once again thankyou for this insightful and clarifying read 😊

    • Nabeel Azeez Sep 28, 2022 @ 16:05

      Thank you. I’m glad you liked it.

  • Sya Oct 11, 2022 @ 22:40

    Assalamualaikum, I wanted to ask, is it haram to say the “f” word while having an intercourse with my husband? Like dirty talk etc? can I even say the “f” word if it’s regarding something sexual with my husband but not intending to cuss since I don’t think there are other words to replace the f word. 🙂

    • Nabeel Azeez Oct 12, 2022 @ 9:10

      Wassalam. This is not a fatwa but dirty talk is fine.

  • Zahraa Nov 5, 2022 @ 10:54

    This is some pretty detailed work. Very happy to know to that there are muslims like you who are working on taboos and educating others. Keep up the good work.

    • Nabeel Azeez Nov 9, 2022 @ 10:04

      Thank you.

  • Humaira Dec 30, 2022 @ 15:15

    So what are the different 48 positions … coz the book is not available online

    • Nabeel Azeez Dec 30, 2022 @ 15:22

      If you’re curious, I’m sure the Kama Sutra features much of the same and is readily available for purchase.

  • Razak Jan 6, 2023 @ 6:33

    Salaam aleikum thanks Nabeel for tha lil education u passing

    • Nabeel Azeez Jan 6, 2023 @ 9:04

      Wa alaikum assalam warahmatullahi wabarakatuh. You’re welcome.

  • Anon Apr 11, 2023 @ 23:05

    Salam alikum,

    The shafi’i mazhab considers semen pure. In that case, wouldn’t it be permissible to ingest?

    • Nabeel Azeez Apr 12, 2023 @ 15:17

      Wassalam. I don’t know. Ask a Shafi’i mufti.

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